How to cope when others resist you changing
Most people resist change. Even if they’re unhappy, they avoid taking action to make life better. But what if you want to change, while others round you don’t? They may even oppose you moving towards...
letting go
Buying your way to happiness? Consumerism is ruining the environment
Concern about the environment is gathering steam. Politicians tout policies to prove their environmental street-cred. Young activists prod the conscience of older generations. Everyone feels virtuous as they mouth slogans that demand action. But is...
Are you responsible for the way others act?
Now, everyone likes to be on good terms with people around them. But sometimes even close friends or family don’t act appropriately. So how much responsibility should you take for changing their behaviour? Are you...
Break free of unspoken rules from the past
Most families have unspoken rules everyone obeys. Usually these help the smooth running of the family. But sometimes these rules are pointless, harsh or even harmful. And yet later in life, we can still feel...
You’re an adult. Break free of unspoken family rules
We’ve discussed before the power of unspoken rules in families. Most of the time these rules are relatively harmless. But sometimes they stop you saying or doing what is best for you. You’re reluctant to...
Be proactive: test your worries to see if they’re valid
Sarah was unaware of the sheer number of her worries. Her brain continually circled round dozens of “what ifs.” But she was so busy worrying, she avoided facing up to her fears. Are you like...
Be realistic – you can’t always make someone else happy
Do you give yourself a hard time for minor lapses? If so, learn to identify your unhelpful self-talk. In the process, let go of unreasonable rules you hold for yourself. For example, you may believe...
Does guilt make you feel responsible for adult children?
Many parents say guilt makes them feel responsible for adult children. They mop up crises and give never-ending support, even though their children may have left home years ago. This habit often starts way back...
Be flexible 2: embrace new paths to reach goals
Life doesn’t always hand you what you want. Sometimes we have to change our plans in ways we don’t like. If you can be flexible and embrace new paths to reach goals, you’ll be ahead...
Mindfulness easy first steps: tips for busy people
The concept of mindfulness has been popular for a few years now. Like to try it but don’t know how to start? Read on to learn some mindfulness easy first steps. But what if you’re...
Mindfulness: more quick and easy exercises for every day
The first two articles in this series focussed on easy mindfulness for beginners. Now let’s look at a range of more everyday mindfulness exercises to extend your practice anywhere, any time. Build on these examples...
Is worry ruining your life?
Are you a worrier? Do others say that you worry too much? Maybe you think they’re wrong: that they’re oblivious to looming problems. Whatever you believe, worry can affect your happiness. Ask yourself honestly: is...
Holding grudges from the past stops you living now
How many of you are holding grudges from the past that stop you living now? Are you replaying distressing conversations word for word? Chances are you’re still hurt or saddened by the impact it’s had...
Mindfulness can dampen strong emotion and reduce snap judgments
Mindfulness helps you observe emotional reactions stirred up by others without judging their motives. Notice and be interested in emotions you feel in social situations, without acting on them or jumping to conclusions. Mindfulness and...
Are you expert at self-deception and wishful thinking?
Are you good at facing reality? Can you accept tiresome truths even if you don’t like them? Or are you expert at self-deception and wishful thinking? Most of us kid ourselves about reality at times....
Mindfulness when difficult people push your buttons
The greatest sources of comfort for many people are close family or friends. But these same people can also cause great pain and sorrow. Use mindfulness when others push your buttons and stir up emotional...
